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The times of calm and the times of difficulty, we learn from everything.
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п»їThe times of calm and the times of difficulty, we learn from everything.
Every life story is written with the ink of calm times and moments of difficulty. There are very few people who go through this world being immune to suffering, dodging like fabulous athletes the obstacles that, from time to time, destiny brings. Each one of us already has an existential background to understand that we learn from everything, from the bad as well as from the good.
Within popular wisdom, there is a very common idea that reminds us that one truly learns what life is when adversity knocks at one's door. Somehow, there are those who think that true knowledge is brought by anguish, moments of despair and the days when we lose something or someone dear to us. To assume this approach is, to say the least, a mistake.
Every experience adds up to learning, whether it is small, big, frightening or part of the most indifferent routine. It is necessary to be open to every event, to every sensation, to every stimulus that arises and enriches our daily life. Because everything we feel adds up.
Everything experienced is added value to our backpack of life. Being receptive and making use of a sensitive, curious and resilient approach in turn, allows us to rise as good navigators in the complex evolution of destiny.
Rollo May, a psychologist of the existentialist school, pointed out that depression is basically the inability of human beings to build a future for themselves and even the inability to believe in it. This is true. Difficult times always bring with them an increase in this type of psychological conditions, those in which people fall into helplessness, into the deepest despondency and the impossibility of thinking beyond the present suffering.
Perhaps this is why times of calm, balance and well-being are so decisive. In a way, they remind us of what is important and what is worth fighting for. The days marked by that peaceful becoming in which everything is routine, in which the days follow one another in harmony, act as anchors. They hold us to what is important. They make us recognize ourselves in those routines and build bonds with those we love.
Those moments where everything is certainty, act as vaccines for moments of pain. Because they guide us, because they remind us of those things that are worth striving for and rising again after hitting rock bottom.
When you have known happiness (or desire it for your future), you can overcome the difficult moments Happiness is not a guaranteed good. It is not something that lasts over time. Likewise, unhappiness is not a mistake of destiny, a stain that tarnishes everything, nor is it someone's inability to see things differently. Not at all. Both the one and the other are part of existence itself, of what we are, of what is, after all, the history of humanity itself.
Now, there is an interesting fact. Those who have known stability, those who have enjoyed a good childhood and enriching moments in life, tend to face hard times with greater skill. Calm times and difficult moments are valuable learning moments for these people.
However, there is a curious and at the same time relevant exception. In a study carried out at the University of California and Southwest University in China, they point out something interesting. Children who have been abandoned or who have suffered mistreatment, manage (in most cases) to overcome their traumas by nurturing hope. Imagining that their future will be happy and auspicious gives them great psychological strength.
Having known well-being and happiness, and even projecting it into the future, gives us a great capacity to overcome difficult times.
Calm times and difficult moments: the courage to experiment, to fall and to get up againCalm times and difficult moments come and go. They are, moreover, the reverse side of the same coin; we cannot always foresee them and, when they come, we enjoy the former and suffer with the latter. The most important thing is not to hold on.
We cannot cling to the idea that this calm will last forever. To think that happiness now is indelible ink is a mistake. Likewise, it is also a mistake to think that adversity is permanent, that those complicated and even painful days are going to maintain their quota indefinitely.
It is our responsibility to prevent this discomfort from becoming chronic and, to do so, we must invest resources, awaken our strengths, know how to ask for help, and allow ourselves to heal little by little.
We could assume, therefore, that times of calm and times of difficulty are cyclical. However, the former are more abundant than the latter, and it is in moments of well-being that we build our vital meanings. Taking care of ourselves, discovering our passions, values, having loved ones by our side is, without a doubt, what will later give us the strength to deal with the ups and downs of destiny. Let us keep this in mind.
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Discover how our emotions can make us more attractive.
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п»їHostility can damage your heart
A recent study carried out in the United States reveals that the personality of individuals has a strong relationship with the diseases they suffer from. Specifically, those who suffer from thickening of the neck artery have been analyzed in comparison with their attitudes towards others and the problems that arise on a daily basis.
Hostile, competitive and aggressive people are more likely to suffer from disorders in their arteries and veins. This is a great risk because it causes diseases such as stroke, which can lead to quadriplegia or cerebral palsy and even death.
To reach this conclusion, researchers at the U.S. National Institute on Aging, led by fellow Angelina Sutin, collected data on more than 5,000 people from four villages in Sardinia, Italy. Those who exhibited negative attitudes such as those listed above were more likely to have thicker neck arteries, called carotids, than people who were more complacent. The most recurrent attitudes were manipulation, anger and aggressiveness. In contrast, those who were calmer and more conciliatory had a lower percentage of problems in their arteries.
In the official statement after the study, it is then indicated that the most competitive people, that is, those who are willing to do anything to fight for their own interests, have thicker artery walls. These personalities can also include distrust, cynicism, egocentrism, manipulation, arrogance, anger and skepticism. This results in an increased risk of cardiovascular disease. In contrast, the complacent (more concerned about the needs of others) maintained healthy levels of their carotid artery.
In order to better explain this research, the Director of the Prevention Center of the Yale University School of Medicine, Dr. David Kartz, states that the "toxic" ingredient that causes not only carotid thickening but also other diseases is active in those who have a personality characterized by hostility. In other words, angry people are the least healthy.
Advances in the area of psychoimmunology reveal that the emotional state influences the production of neutrotransmitter hormones that are 100% related to the immune system and nerves.
Living a healthier life, exercising more, quitting smoking, trying to take things more calmly and quietly, avoiding unnecessary fights, reducing stress, controlling anger and breathing consciously is positive for the heart.
What to know about psychoimmunologyIt has a name that is difficult to read and pronounce, however it is a branch of neuroscience that emerged in the 60's in the United States and currently several countries in Europe and America have professional experts in the field.
Basically, it studies the interaction that takes place between the mind and the body, as well as its clinical implications. In other words, it has a lot to do with medicine. Surely you have heard of someone who is "psychosomatic", that is, who thinks he/she is sick and therefore suffers the same symptoms of that pathology.
Something similar is what psychoneuroimmunoendocrinology analyzes (if you thought the other one was a complicated name, this is the right one). This branch is dedicated to the study of the relationship between the central nervous system, psychic processes, the immune system and the endocrine system. It brings together knowledge from various fields such as psychology, psychiatry, physiology, immunology, neuroscience and behavioral medicine.
It mainly investigates how the body and the immune system function in relation to people's thoughts, attitudes and personality. One of the most important aspects of this branch is stress. It is already confirmed to be the cause of a large number of diseases and disorders. It can cause everything from hypertension to premature aging, obesity, osteoporosis, cancer, diabetes and learning disabilities.
So, going back to the research, there is no doubt that all the attitudes detailed above cause stress and thus heart problems.
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6 keys to prevent the mind from wandering when meditating
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п»ї6 keys to prevent the mind from wandering when meditating
Meditating is an opportunity to connect with ourselves, to begin to be aware of how we feel and to observe the noise of our thoughts, in addition to many other benefits. However, preventing the mind from wandering when meditating requires a lot of practice and the right techniques to achieve this.
Many people believe that meditation is not for them, because they think that they will not be able to stop thinking or that they are unable to relax. Therefore, it is necessary to clarify that the goal of meditation is not to stop all thoughts, nor to leave the mind blank.
If you have thoughts when meditating, do not worry, it is perfectly normal. Our minds are very active machines. In fact, it is estimated that we have between 60,000 and 80,000 thoughts a day. It is logical to think that with these numbers, that to deactivate at will the act of thinking is not something simple.
However, what meditation teaches us is not to cling to thoughts and not to run away with them. We can allow them to come and go, but without letting ourselves be carried away by the story or the emotion they may provoke. Therefore, learning how to prevent the mind from wandering when meditating is one of the keys to mastering this discipline.
Here are some useful tips to prevent the mind from wandering when meditating.
1. Use the breathIt helps the mind to have a task to focus on. Thus, breathing exercises are a good way to keep the mind focused, while helping the body to relax.
To use this technique, you can simply count inhalations and exhalations. For example, you can go from one to one hundred. If your mind wanders and you realize you've lost count, that's okay. Be gentle with yourself and start over.
Focusing attention on the breath helps keep the mind from wandering when meditating.
2. Draw or imagine shapes Try drawing a triangle with your imagination while you are breathing (inhale, exhale, hold or inhale, hold, exhale). Another version of this exercise involves trying to draw a square in your mind (inhale, hold, exhale, hold).
Occasionally, you can help yourself with a visual element that you have around you to make it easier for your mind to focus on it. For example, the flame of a candle.
3. Practice guided meditationThere is no right or wrong way to meditate. Silent meditation is one way to do it, but another possible way may be to use a guide to help you. When you are directed by someone's voice and they are teaching you visualization exercises, the mind is usually occupied with images. Thus, there is less space for your thoughts to run.
There are a multitude of resources, both audio and video, for guided meditations. Many of them can be found for free on the Internet. Do a little exploring, and you'll have no trouble finding one you like.
4. Accept your thoughtsWhen practicing silent meditation, instead of trying to push thoughts away, welcome them. It often happens that what we resist persists. Therefore, welcoming them will allow you to have more freedom. One way to do this is to integrate them into a pleasant image.
For example, you can imagine that your mind is like the blue sky and your thoughts are like the clouds passing through it. Or that your mind is a river and your thoughts are logs moving with the current. In this way, you allow the coming and going of those thoughts. Thus, your thoughts will not affect you, you will not depend on them and you will not prevent them from lingering and hurting you. Just watch them float away.
5. Write down your thoughtsIf you have a lot on your mind, it may be useful for you to record those thoughts before meditating. In this way, you will be giving them an outlet and prevent them from obsessing you.
Write down all your thoughts as they appear, without analyzing them, judging them and without stopping to think if you are formulating each one correctly. Depositing everything you have in your mind on paper will help you enormously in your meditations.
6. Practice regularlyPracticing at the same time every day, and in the same place, causes your mind to know what is coming. Thus, you will feel more comfortable doing it. The mind is not trained to be still and, therefore, will fight against a sudden request to stop doing what it does naturally.
Therefore, it is essential that you create the habit of freeing yourself from your thoughts. Only then will you be able to prevent the mind from wandering when meditating.
Don't underestimate the power of meditationMeditating is simple, but not easy. Nevertheless, it is worth learning to do it and including it in your life as a daily habit. Research has shown that practicing this technique can have positive benefits on emotional well-being and physical health.
In addition, it is indicated to treat serious conditions such as depression, anxiety, heart disease, high blood pressure, sleep problems, chronic pain... With the keys you have found in this article, meditating will be much easier for you. However, now it's your turn. Try to practice this discipline and the results will surprise you.
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