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п»їPrevent what you can't do from interfering with what you can do
How many times have we lost ourselves in spirals of thoughts about situations we cannot control? We have also fallen into "this temptation" instead of using that time to modify other aspects that we could influence. Many people live worried and paralyzed by situations and circumstances that they cannot directly change, looking at the station helplessly while trains pass by for which they can buy tickets.
More and more people spend a large part of their lives criticizing or praising people they don't even know, especially on the Internet. They get angry and stop their daily activities because they give a tweet or a comment the power to turn their day "upside down". Thus, when we complain about results that are not under our control, we give up the only thing we can control, our mind and our actions.
Intervening where we do have influence is the best way to build ourselves. He thinks that in a society that is constantly trying to get us to fit into a mold it has prepared for us, being yourself-with edges and vertices of your own-is the greatest achievement.
"You can do anything, but you can't do everything."
-David Allen
Get a lifeThere is an expression in English, "get a life" that literally translates to "get yourself a life" and actually comes to mean "live your life." The real meaning is deeper. This phrase expresses the need to live without jumping from blockage to blockage, from impotence to impotence, wearing ourselves out thanks to the guilt and responsibility that we nurture even in the face of those results that we cannot control.
The question is, how does one live life? The answer may vary depending on the person who assumes the rest of answering. If you ask a Buddhist monk and a rock singer, you will probably get two answers that are totally different in form. Moreover, you will learn something from both of them, so you will have to construct your own.
If we live focused on what we cannot control, such as the success or failure of our neighbor or the wind today that will hinder our work, we are unconsciously diverting our energy instead of investing it in developing our resources, either in our favor or in the favor of the people we love.
When we criticize others, in a way, we are trying to live someone else's life. To live our own we need to believe in ourselves, something that will be much easier if we like ourselves. We will look inside ourselves more if when we do we like what we see. Thus, when we accept ourselves we stop wanting to live someone else's life, starting to fully enjoy our own.
If you fight for yourself you may lose, but if you don't fight you are lost.
How to stop worrying about what we can't doNot completely losing certain external references is healthy. It keeps us thinking ahead and helps us work to overcome the unexpected. However, when those references are so important that they produce worry that overwhelms us, our life is burdened with an unbearable and unnecessary weight of stress.
It is difficult to control these thoughts, even knowing that our worry can only worsen our condition. However, that doesn't mean we can't make a conscious effort to focus our thoughts on other goals, letting events take their course.
Worry alone doesn't fix anything, and there are goals that you won't achieve before or simply won't achieve no matter how much you worry. We all don't drive based on different variables that we don't control: the weather, the lottery, or whether we have a particularly stubborn parent.
You never know what might happen in the future, because problem-free lives don't exist. But even so, we shouldn't fret about what hasn't happened yet, since the only way the future can harm us is by making us worry.
"Forget about the place you're running away from. Reserve your worry for the place you are headed."
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